Sophisticated love.

First off, i want to start with the reason's i'm taking guitar: all my friends that have made a difference in my life, a significant, monumental change in me, i wanna make a song, for them, they inspire me, like Akshay, John, Lakshmi, Shi, Benjamin, Amos, Elvin, Jiamin and Wenny. I hope my willpower is strong enough for me to finish the lessons and to convince daddy to pay for me, and i'm strong enough to hold on, to the stress i'll be facing, for the sake of the people i just mentioned <3

Anyways, i'll start off with yesterday, i was playing SEA with Shi till 6am, and we were talking about me, wanting to play the guitar and i sorta sing, she can play the piano and violin. So if i become hot, an international idol, we made a promise, we'll buy a villa in Sentosa, and we'll live together, with our dream korean husbands, mine's SeungRi and her's DaeSung, well see, SeungRi's only 4 years older than i am, ONLY <3

Then, she can create a band, and we can play the band.

or i can recommend her, so she'll become hot cakes too <3

and we talked about, if my song's actually get produced, and the ones about my loved ones, i want the MV to be shoot in States, and Shi will be in it <3

and so, we spent like over an hour talking about BigBang, 2NE1, DBSK, Super Junior <3

today, i finally dragged myself up after about 4hours of sleep, gelien told me she's not going anymore, i was kinda upset, but then, i made waffles to meimei, and mysel, i was proud.

well, then audi-ed a little, i was 8king with this girl, turns out she plays Redbana too, so we went on Redbana and 8k-ed, and we had so much fun singing and everything <3

Around 5, i went out, walked to walgreens, got milk duds and ice tea and i walked to VRE to ride the swings. i started thinking, is it just me? i'm wrong to be bipolar, or am i just asking too much? I'm just trying to get what i want in a relationship, that everyone has, and everyone deserves, is that really too much? Am i suppose to bury the promise of us being forever once i leave? i just had so much on my mind .-. do i keep hoping, or have you really given up on us? Not given up on me, but us .-. maybe, you don't understand, cause you're not me, you have no idea the worries that are on my mind, the insecures that i'm facing, all you know is i'm being selfish cause i said that, but you don't know the exact reason. Well, then again, i blog what i'm thinking, if you're reading it, i'm not trying to start a fight with you, i'm just blogging out my feelings. so don't think i'm trying to whine or anything, i really don't wish to start another fight.

i'm confused.

anyways, so i walked home, had dinner, and i walked out with Jermaine again, to ride the swings. This time, there were lotos of indian kids, but we had a blast, well i did, and i feel so proud that i'm starting to take care of my sister <3>

so anyways, came home, shower and everything, watched tv, played audi with Shi, and boom, its 5:05 am and i'm really tired now. But today, was full of accomplishments, well it might be nothing to other people, it might be what they do daily, but its a big deal to me <3

"A girl is something to cherish and keep special in your heart<3